What happened in Samui

10 October 2008, 11:30pm

I’m writing this entry three hours after we touched down, though I think it’d be much later when you gals/guys get to read this.

I need to write this down because, hey, only the lucky ones get proposed ONCE in their lifetimes.
So there.

The proposal, in his own words, was a ‘simple one’.
Indeed it was.
No flowery language, no story-telling, no speech, no props (except for the blink, that is).
It was his birthday that day and we just went back into our room after a long day out. He was going on about taking a walk down the beach to watch the sunset before dinner, and I was trying to tell him that perhaps the beach is not at the western part of Samui and therefore there might not be any sunset to witness.
But since it was his birthday, I was ok to oblige.
So, we were in the middle of the little decision-making (ie to go to the beach or head straight for a nice dinner) when he suddenly stopped me and went down on one knee.
And then he whipped out The Box from his left pocket.

The transcript of what followed would probably read like this:
Him: Dear, would you marry me?
Me: HUH? Are you kidding?
Him: (Opening The Box to reveal The Ring) Huh, erm, no, I’d not kidding. Would you marry me?
Me: HUH? Is this a real ring?
Him: Erm, yes.
Me: HUH? Is this a joke?
Him: No, I’m serious. Really! Would you marry me?
Me: HUH? You are serious? But why?
Him: Erm, because I love you.
Me: HUH? No, I mean, seriously, why?
Him: Erm, I thought I said it already. Because I love you, so would you marry me?
Me: Hmmm.
Him: So is that a yes or no?
Me: Hmmm.
Him: Ok, I will continue kneeling until you say yes.
Me: Hmmm. Can I say no?
Him: Erm, of course you can? So is that a yes or no?
Me: Hmmm. Are you serious?
Him: Yes.
Me: Ok lor.
Him: So that’s a yes? (Whips out The Ring and slips it into the forth finger of my left hand)
Me: I guess.
Him: Yay.
Me: So, what just happened? Can you do that again? I can’t quite remember.

If there is an award for the funniest or the most boring proposal, I think this would come up tops. :P
It took quite a while for everything to sink in.
He only did his storytelling the next morning, after we woke up from the whirlwind of events (ok, actually just two events the day before: his birthday, and The Proposal).

He wanted to propose at the beach, with the sunset in the background (yeah, damn romantic).
He also thought of putting The Ring in the champagne glass at the restaurant where we would be having dinner (yeah, damn creative).
But he thought better of those options because:
1. Knowing me, I cannot take public declaration of love very well. And might end up either running away or beating him up before he gets the yes/no answer.
2. He didn’t want to spoil The Ring by putting it in a glass.
He prepared a speech for the proposal, which he didn’t present during the proposal (but the morning after). His take was that the situation then did not allow for a speech or story-telling and he had to act fast before I turn the door knob and head out.
Though I think (and he admitted) it was because he was too nervous to say much and I am lucky to be able to hear a coherent full sentence (see Line 1 of transcript above).

He caught me by surprise.
Although he insisted he had dropped hints weeks before this, bringing me to look at rings he claimed were for his girlfriend.
He’d ask me, do you think my girlfriend would say yes if I propose with this ring?
And I’d go, erm I am not sure, I don’t really know your girlfriend.

So yeah, I didn’t have a clue.

I didn’t start the relationship knowing or thinking I’d marry him.
To be very honest, it is not my life-long dream to get married. I have nothing for or against marriage, it is just not something I think about often.
But being with him for more than four years, during which there were such bad times that I wanted to give up and walk away, I think we are ready for the next stage.
My idea of the process of getting married is strictly, a “would you marry me?” followed by “shall we apply for a flat?”. It cannot be the other way around. And it cannot have just Part 2 and no Part 1.
Of course this is not to say that friends or people who did not follow MY process are wrong; it is just my own logical flow.
I need to know, officially, that you want me to marry you, before I say a yes or no, before we apply for a flat.
I was more surprised than touched by his proposal.
It was the talk we had the morning after the official proposal that touched and convinced me, because it told me how he has thought through it, how well he knows me, and how reassuring he can be when I am in doubt.

So yes, I am ready, and looking forward to it.