“No updates on WordPress?” Asked the hubs yesterday.
It was Day 1 of my hospitalization leave at home but aye, I’d lost the momentum once again.
The past week leading up to the surgery had been horrifically busy and stressful.
Monday and Tuesday were cramped with meetings.
I was off on Wednesday for my pre-op check-up. Because of my hypothyroidism condition, I had to do ECG on top of the blood tests.
On the same day we also managed to 1) visit the temple, 2) get our hair cut, 3) try out Man Man Unagi (new branch at Ubi) and 4) pick up the little boss from school.
Oh yeah I managed to take #fotd.
Thursday was the day of my BU’s offsite meeting at Sentosa, one of the biggest sources of stress.
I was asked to do a TEDx style presentation of a personal story about being small but powerful.
I got the email from the leadership team on Friday and my first reaction was to share the news with the hubs and my sisters, with the caption “Mai lah“.
I didn’t think I have anything interesting to share, and more critically, I don’t enjoy public speaking even though I’ve done a few.. much less TEDx style which usually entails talking without holding a script.
But aye it’s not something I can reject and while it is rather bad timing I thought I’d take it as a challenge and have something to share with the girls.. “You know mummy gave a speech on stage?“.. 😂
I spent Monday and Tuesday night writing my script and doing up a simple PowerPoint presentation with just 3 slides.
My story was about 2 small but powerful people – Clarissa and my younger self when I was just 2-4 years in the company.
The idea I wanted to share, was how you are only as small as you imagine you are, but you can be as powerful as you want to be – if you practise hard enough, if you are humble enough to learn and unlearn and relearn, if you have the conviction and courage to do or fight for what you believe is right.
Just like how Clarissa practised for her dance performance. Just like how I used to hustle for data, research, whatever it took to get my recommendations across.
I actually enjoyed putting the story together.
Wednesday night, before Clarissa went to bed, I told her I had a speech the next day and asked if I could practise it with her.
She listened intently, clearly pleased that she was mentioned in my story.
But aye, I had difficulty remembering my script lol and she kept asking me, “Mummy, why so long your story?”
I took her feedback and went to edit and cut down my story.
The next morning, she had tears in her eyes when I told her I was going to work on my own and not dropping her off in school with Daddy.
“What about your speech? I thought Daddy and I are going to watch?” She said, upset. She thought my speech was like her dance performance and was so excited she even told her Yaya about it.
I think I did ok enough for the presentation, even though I missed out some parts of the story.
I had very lovely colleagues who came up to me and told me, “I love your story!”
Nonetheless it was very nervewrecking.
And the day wasn’t over for me.
Come evening time, I had to put up a newcomer performance because I am a newcomer to the BU.
For the past 10 years I’d managed to escape all sorts of performance, even the new hire performance which most new hires cannot run away from.
To make matters worse I was made team leader of my group!?
I jokingly asked a colleague (who is Singaporean and born in the same year as me, what are the chances) if I’m exuding the wrong image. Do people think I love performing? Because if so, I need to do something about it. 😓😂
She assured me I do not look anything like it.
So.. No choice but to fulfill my duties.
I tried my best not to be too self conscious.
My boss, who was my boss eight years ago, congratulated me for two jobs well done, laughed and said to me, “Today I saw so many sides of you I didn’t know before. Maybe having kids really changed you.”
She might be right.
I missed bedtime that night because I only got home at 10pm.
The next morning, Clarissa woke up and came into Allie’s room to look for me.
The first thing she said, as she rubbed her eyes, was:
“Mummy, how was your speech? Did you say the correct things?”
I told her I think I did ok.
I spent Friday working from home, which was a good decision because I had so much work to finish before the surgery.
I wasn’t sure how long I’d be away for, because the nurse told us it could take as long as a month.
I was quite horrified to hear that, because it sounded so serious.
My bosses and co-workers were very understanding about it, but still. Imagine the backlog of work!
I shall write about the op.. another day. 😂
For now, I’m just hoping I can start walking upright again soon.
Thankful for my supportive family, friends and co-workers.
And lovely flowers from Sim!